Day #349 In-house elf

We have an elf in our office. No, it’s not Dobby, esq, Elf Attorney-at-Law. It’s not the fae or one of the fair folk or sídhe (though I hear they’re fab at exploiting contractual loopholes!).

It is, of all things, our very own in-house elf-on-the-shelf. When our department relocated one floor up over the weekend and I showed up bright and early on Monday morning to settle into the new digs, he was plastered to an abandoned computer screen protector at one of the print stations. The following day he was stuck to the outside wall of that same print station, a bright splash of crimson on a stark white wall. It was like some hideous holiday caricature of a crucifix on the wall.


I lost sight of him after that and forgot about him until I sat down at my desk this morning. I sighed deeply, wrapping my hands around my morning mug of tea and taking a deep gulp, and then I looked up….

Now, I sit further away than the photo, so I didn’t really see that it was an elf sitting on a swing suspended from one of the light fixtures. I swear it looked like someone had strung him up by the wrists. Like, maybe he had finally gotten on the wrong side of someone in a legal dispute and was now hanging up there in preparation for being drawn and quartered, a gruesome example to anyone else daring to step out of line. I had to get closer to realise that this was not actually the case.

I am not sure if the elf is being moved on a daily basis or not and who on the floor is responsible for his placement, but it is a certain amount of entertainment in the mad rush to finish up this week for the holidays. Tomorrow we are all heading out for a late Christmas lunch (you know, the kind of lunch that lasts all the way until dinner) after exchanging our secret santa gifts, so perhaps he will preside over the proceedings in our kitchen.


  1. “…Like some hideous holiday caricature of a crucifix on the wall.”
    I’m not a fan of the Shelf Elf in general, but especially dislike the macabre variations -at least with children.
    Now that I’m thinking about it, I’d probably go with somewhat odd, scary, or humorous for an office.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m pretty certain this one’s not meant to be macabre at all, just humorous. But as you know it’s all in the eye is the beholder… 😁 I don’t mind harmless office fun. Keeps the place interesting! But with kids I agree, you need at the very least to be cognisant of your own child’s maturity, age, and sensibility before indulging in scary or macabre.

      Liked by 1 person

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